I ended up with a sunburn and almost threw up for my birthday and it was awesome!


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My birthday has come and gone but it was a great one. It actually was celebrated over two days which honestly is the best way to do it. Saturday was a family celebration that they went all out for and surprised me with. From signs around the neighborhood wishing me a happy birthday to banners and streamers and even a piƱata just for kicks. It was crazy and fun all at the same time. I felt like a little kid again which is a fun gift in itself. My family is pretty awesome that way. Sunday was the trip to Six Flags and I’m so glad we went. A whole bunch of weird and funny things happened and I almost puked but it was fun and I can’t wait to go back.

To start, we woke up early to a rain storm which made us all nervous. Thankfully it cleared up well before we made it to the park. We were one of the first people there so parking was a breeze. We rode on the tram to take us up the hill to the entrance when we learned the tram driver hates his job. He shared so we just nodded and listened. I would hate his job too so I can’t blame him. Then we hiked up the steps and over the bridge to the main gate. We got in line right near the front and waited the 25 minutes until they opened. Next thing we knew two gates away from us were opened and allowing people in. Then the handicap/stroller gate opened but not the one we were in front of or the one next to us. A guy in front got a ticket takers attention and asked if the gate was being opened. She said no and that we had to go to the back of the long ass line. That was NOT happening. There was no way we were going to get in a never-ending line behind people who just pulled up. We stepped over into the handicap/stroller line along with everyone else and waited. Someone nearby said “they better not say we can’t go in this gate,” and the guy in front of us loudly said, “Oh! They’re letting ME in!” Once he said that though we got our way and they opened the original gate we were waiting for. It was really silly. Once in the park we rented a locker and then waited behind a red rope as an overly perky woman narrated a character dance show before they “officially” opened. I’m not a morning person and hate crazy perky morning people, but I had my caffeine for the day so I didn’t feel the urge to kill her. Maybe smack her but not commit murder.

After the mess of getting in was over we jumped in the first line and raced around a wooden rollercoaster built in the 40s. It makes you feel like you might die but that’s part of the fun! Next we hit the big coaster of the park and it’s almost straight drop. As always, it was awesome! I could ride that all damn day. A while later we made a bathroom stop and I had a surprise waiting for me in my stall. Apparently some woman decided wearing a bra to the park is just silly, as she left it on top of the toilet paper dispenser. I couldn’t believe it. If I had a camera on me I would have snapped a picture just to prove it to you. I also learned in this same bathroom that Six Flags must use all their water for the water rides because they only give you about point 5 second burst of water at a time to wash your hands. So you stand there like an idiot trying to get it to give you a few more drops to actually get the soap off. Then getting paper towel is like a weird “wax on – wax off” reenactment because it gives you a square the size of a CD case and you have to keep waving at the box to get more. No wonder men just wipe their hands on their pants!

I guess the rain scared away a lot of people because the lines were really short especially for middle of summer. We never waited more then 20 minutes for a ride and usually it was much less then that. We made fun of the flash pass people because they wasted money when it really wasn’t needed. Did you know those things cost $30.00 per person for the day?! Its nuts! I rather just wait. You can count it as family or friend bonding time as you try to entertain each other. You also have to pay $3.50 for a bottle of water if you want to avoid passing out from heat stroke. Some people can skip this all day but I’m not one of them. I dehydrate like it’s a fashion statement so I have to basically inhale water like it’s going out of style. This backfired on me at one point when I drank too much water too fast and then got on a ride that spun you in circles really fast as it swung you through the air. Yeah, it wasn’t my brightest moment. I got off the ride ready to throw up and never wanting to go near that ride again. I never ever get sick on rides so I knew it had to be because of the water. It took a while to recover so I had to sit down like an old lady and wait for the urge to go all exorcist chick on everyone went away. It was good times.

At one point we were next in line for a ride and watched as a particularly large woman was kicked off the ride for being too big. The ride attendant person was as nice as she could be about it but I still felt so bad. She had to feel humiliated in front of all those people but that was nothing compared to what the guy she was with did. I think it was her boyfriend but if not it was at least a friend she was there with. As she was walking away he sat there laughing his ass off with the other friends about her being kicked off. We could hear him and he was a few rows down! It was horrible. Still thinking he was her boyfriend I couldn’t help turn to our group and say, “well, we know he’s not getting laid tonight.” I still feel bad for the poor woman and I hope she let him have it once he was done with his ride. Asshole. We also found out the people that work at Six Flags don’t know a thing about what goes on in Six Flags. They don’t know their own show schedule and have no idea why the rides they run are randomly shut down for a bit. It’s not very reassuring at all if you think about it for more then 3 seconds so I recommend you don’t.

The rest of the day was pretty uneventful until we left. About 15 minutes after we left the park we literally drove into a wall of rain. One second it was dry and sunny and the next we were in the middle of a monsoon. Everyone had to drive at about 5 MPH and pretend you could see where you were going. Then just as fast as it began, it stopped. I looked up and the most amazing rainbow I have ever seen appeared. It was bright and each color was easily distinguished as it was in full arch across the sky. We tried to get pictures but it wouldn’t show up on the camera. It was truly beautiful. Traffic slowed down again because everyone was trying to get a good look at it. Those don’t happen very often around here. It wasn’t one that disappeared really fast either, it lingered for a long time. After a little while traffic slowed way down again and we had no idea why. We later realized it was all because some car was pulled to the side of the road where a guy stood smoking. Why that caused a slow traffic jam is beyond me. I guess it was entertaining to some people or confusing, either way it caused us to take 30 minutes to drive what should have taken about 10.

Also on the way home we spotted a Virgin Mary statue standing in the woods facing the highway right before we saw a man taking a shit next to his car on the side of the road. That’s the kind of world we live in people. I couldn’t let myself forget any of this so I ended up taking notes in the car on an empty envelope. I called it my cliffnotes of the trip. It was also on the way home that I realized I had developed a sunburn on my chest and that really made me feel special. I had managed to burn while wearing 85spf sunscreen on a cloudy day. Yes, I am that talented! It’s not a really bad one but it was enough to cause some pain. I now can understand the appeal of those women who wear fabric from head-to-toe. We saw some at Six Flags with those on and I can’t for the life of me remember what they’re called. Whatever they are and for, they are definitely great protection from the sun! Overall it was a great trip and I want to go back every day. We might go back in October when I hopefully won’t have such a sunburn and heat stroke problem. One can only hope.

Even though I had scorched skin, chills from the heat, a sore ass from the wooden rollercoasters that make you slam into your seat and almost threw up projectile vomit style it was a blast and I really enjoyed my birthday!

Thanks for the birthday wishes! =)

1 comments:

The Peach Tart said...
July 31, 2009 at 8:31 AM

Happy birthday. Glad you enjoyed it. I love Six Flags.

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